Un Dulce Palpito..La Clave Intima

Ya nada puede impedir En mi fragilidad
Es el curso de las cosas
Oh mi corazon se vuelve delator
Se abren mis esposas



There is something in me that is still alive. Not that it pumps blood into my veins, or keeps my body functioning. Its not the fact that its one of the most vital organs...Deep in its recesses...there is still a part working, that has long been overshadowed by another organ that I wish would SHUT THE HELL UP once in a while.


Whoever said that the brain is the center of the emotions obviously has never been through depression or heartache or has lost or gazed into the eyes of a loved one.


How else can I explain the swelling in my chest when I look at my nephew Lucas?
Id like to know why when I fucking cry..I feel like my chest is caving in?
OR when I go to sleep at night..Why does its beat rumble so loud in fast in my ears as if it were going to chase after whatever Im dreaming about?

Yes...for better or for worse..It still works. I am content with knowing that.

2006..Sweet Surrender

And sweet
Sweet surrender
Is all that I have to give

New Year...New Beginnings. At least thats what we all want to think everytime a new event has begun. I can tell this year is going to be full of unexpected twists and turns...just by looking at the way it started out.
You need a change of air..Im flying you up to NYC for 10 days.
Those were the words of my lovely sister Keila...And they marked the beginning of 2006.

So basically in pictures I can recreate my December-January 2006 trip:











Yes..I drank and danced the nights away, shopped untill my heels were begging for mercy, visited a few friends..was wined and dined..But the culmination of my trip..was what I did for my birthday:


Freedom From Fear


Those are the words I had forged in sanskrit (the first language of the world) into my skin on my 22nd birthday.


Freedom from Fear of what?
-Of allowing myself to take risks
-Of confronting responsibility for the decisions I make.
-Of letting my fingers and my crazy mind take control of this blog.
-Of the unexpected -Of giving myself another chance.
-Of letting people climb the walls Ive built.
-Of what other mindless people have to say about me.
-Of falling in love

We spend so much time...so much wasted time..fearing consequences, fearing everything life has to offer. What a big crock of bullshit.
Yo no estoy diciendo que esta actitud cambia de un dia para otro...ese miedo lo llevamos tan incrustados en nuestras conciencias que no nos permite degustar de las delicias que nos ofrecen todos los dias de la vida.. Pero por algun lado hay que comenzar.
I wish everyone who takes a few minutes of their lives to read my neurotic blog, a year 2006 free from whatever it is they fear.
And please..cuentenme...que cosa tan insignificante y mundana temen ustedes?